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(refined)
i realise songs do play a huge role in setting up ur mood.. normally whilst expressing, i'd cont to play a song wch generally comes frm my blog of one of my favs. i decided to switch to typical 小步舞曲 coz prev gigi's song caught me too emotionally to even write things down especially when i need to make a positive point on life, or i had to..

ppl'd realise i've been going on a lubricious phase of life lately especially the recent few weeks. yes indeed i had. its not easy living again i admit. nw.. i hope the point of creating this post today wud be worthwhile in part for me personally to let it out as well as to refine a resolution to get by the next few weeks of intensity.

life's tough 'a bit'. i admit. generally, i'd come by for a while, immerse into it and swiftly pick myself up agn at its usual sense. u knw.. being in an academic position im in is not easy. nt only tt. being a person living a life at age of 22 and finding ur sense of life is also not clear-cut. i.. feel im quite deprived to certain tngs. it came to my realisation so clearly when national events came up and ppl wud strt asking.. 'u going to the river festival?' or 'u going to ekka?' and i ask myself.. 'where are my frens to go with?'

its simple indeed and straight-forward. ans is im not caught up to have frens coz i cant spend time with them owing to the lovely life im putting up with. more came to me when i knew its not as legitimate as it seems. its nt just act of preserving time itself, but smethn always kept on my mind tt i still think its best to be like this for nw and then.

'switched to gigi's song and hear for moments.. i hah truly cudn't put my keyboard words down.. time to change'.. 小步舞曲 again.

i wanted to go back. alwez in my mind, i waited for tt moment. 'go back meaning return to the place, being comfortable and peaceful in heart itself. but not devoting.'
i abide this solitude coz i knw its for the best tgh its hard. coz i knw if i do go back, i'll never feel right as long as a figure appears. i'll never knw wt worse cud i put up with and bring such perplexing moments between us, tgh frenship is once i so wished. nw, its always abt moving on. tts why i chose this way. i'd wish sincerely u move on too, whilst we lead on diff paths.

next topic. man.. i have '6' more weeks to get it done. the whole one year course ends in 6 weeks. fuff.. its quite challenging atm. concomitantly, im putting up with this disposition but as always for these whole 3-4 years, it happens b4 the exam. i'll 'try'. tts the only word i can promise. the rest is up to 'fate' whether i get thru or not to 2nd year~ 'switch to gee agn'
- keith