2013

As time ticks tocks towards the new year, my heart just at once felt on its own, mixed~ The only way it led to me was the need to feel what it's like for the past year, what I've gone through and yet somehow lingering to the near distant past. It's a wonder how I still remember to write and when I had relied on my blog so much often before, realising it still comes to use once in a blue moon.

This year is not a bad year` my first head start to a career~ I still remember vividly, during the first few weeks of emergency I was super duper excited just getting to work alone. All I knew in my head was waking up early.. each moment walking to the hospital and spending time chit-chatting means each minute/hour towards earning that much~ I'm just like a bubbly junior citizen finally getting to some use, and the best thing is you're an Intern AND you won't get blamed for anything! so I make use of it, felt so good.. and cudn't imagine how my patience and humbleness towards patients fluorished even in the midst of being the only one of two doctors in the fast track area.

As time goes by, rotations one-by-one passed.. I just felt like my whole perspective of being a doctor changed. you suddenly realised that you are in need to push yourself from just being a full-time clerk to somewhat a person of somebody~ someone known at least by anyone! My rotation allocations led me to a very admirable start, but somehow sloping down towards the end of the year~ either reflecting my particular interest in only certain fields OR that I eventually grew out of energy and patience just working generally in this busy, loaded world.

In the face of these challenges, I am always reminded towards my days as a med student.. trying to strive each moment of time where there's no certainty in everything you do. I'm also reminded of being healthy and well, knowing my future long-term goals and that sometimes even working without the pure enjoyment does seem a bit of struggle, but you know always there are wonderful colleagues to help you through your everyday life. The life towards my career is yet a long journey~ and I feel the need to improve in my learning and standard of competence for the near far future. And that hopefully makes part of this whole new year's resolution.

given too in this past one year alone, I've experienced far more deeply in terms of being in a relationship. I just feel the importance of being needed, the times we go forth toward ups and downs unconditionally and faithfully, the tolerance on meeting each others' discrepancies and we never knew, but we just wanted to go on and on... creating more memories on top of those that have been already sweetly carved into our hearts and minds. I thank you. for being the one. and I wish for all times that you remain with me this coming new year, next year, year beyond and onn.... I love you dear~ :) 

I want to send my condolences to a sister whom I knew from church~ and plse God bless her very beautiful soul and her passion towards Christ. My whole family for best of health and well-being~ my friends, both of the thomases, hoping to achieve love very soon` =) and just anyone else for a blessed new year~ so much to say, I saw Gigi's 2013 post- "Forget the bad things...Value the Good things...". that makes a lot of sense on a positive reachievement towards my personality as a Cancerian. how many pasts I've learnt to forgive and forget, but never fail to reminisce the beauty of the past. and yet that lady has always determined to pull me out of my shell to realise the wonders of what future can bring~

I'm moving soon out from home to Emerald, and there's a lot to clear before doing so. I can't wait to get back home in April already!, this is how much I love Australia~ hah.. and it is to get by this year, and not thinking about the prospect of the year next~ Happy New Year 2013! :)

 - keith

my life~

It's been some time now~ :) listening to the sentiments of my music playing in this blog just zooms back to the times when I used to hear this often. *laughs at myself*- I must be a person of emotional beauty, I just cherish the times when I'm used to be.. so... myself`


life nowadays, okay... have been starting on med, wch is quite challenging and overloaded with jobs. I'm constantly working, having to enjoy and appreciate the job that I have. I knw I'm lucky to have been here~ and most likely extending next year, despite the tough chance of job space then~ *let off a breathe*~ fuff... I'm just tired~ probably it's encrypted to my life. to work hard~ and be determined to` :)

smetmes life has its ups and downs. you can be happy and sad the next time. be good and bad the other times. some good may be rich, some bad may be very bad too. but I guess from my life experience... we all need to be just keeping ourselves on. moving on.. that's the word. life is like an ocean wave, going up.. and down. my once very good buddy, advised me~ if you're in a good state, sure the next time will be bad... so be prepared and get used to it! I learnt from this... u knw its just normal and its part of life~

well let it be my career, for if I pursue my registrar level... my relationship, the distance afar yet the complex future uncertainties.. or my health, which will be unpredictable. you knw~ going thru the uni years, I learnt from my wonderful and hardened past, filled full of beautiful emotions, that... you can only wait one day that you'll live with glory~ keep on to yourself, be determined and love yourself, till one day... you'll find that life which will put a smile to your face` :)

that's what life is about. we will see goodness. we can only live towards that. I lived the life of wreck, the world of loneliness and now I'm used to it` I have goals now... I just want to achieve them, and go back home~ I know life is short` we need to make use of each of it. I just want to settle down and be loved~ that's all I ask for` tiring it is... but I know I can do it. that's my life~ I live to work, love and cherish the life around me. I knw I just have to chill.. and let time pass~

how many more emotions. :) I'm cut out of this crap now~ hadn't gone back to that for a loongg time.. I've got a lovely family and a lovely gf~ I've to thank god for this. Just wish everyone the best of health, cos nothing is more imprnt than that. wish all is good.. and I hope mine too.

Love,
Keith

home food 2

wow... surprised with new blogger's template and editing style~ it gives me a new fresh feeling of having to type these words of expression.. but in this post, it's to be of food again.. a short one` ;)

today's dish is beef casserole. I had beef steak of scotch bought frm Woolies. my first intention was just a simple soy sauce marinate, not until I reached out for a packet of casserole mix that can change my dish. As with all beef dishes, they can be simple yet delicious.. even with good mixes with veges just like this particular cook -she just merely mixed with broccolli and cabbage.. silly~~ and it shud taste just as good.

my dish is just a mixture of purple onion, beef slices and mushroom. that's all! stir-fry and finally mix with a bit of pepper and the sauce-mix and you get this casserole! mistake was to put all the powder from the pack, as just half shud be just nice` =) and it does look darker than it shud be.. lol! anyways~ it just tastes nice` :)

anyways.. life to me is so good so far~ in my mind, its about working, enjoy working.. and working 2wards my goal. on top of that, it's the blessing of loving altogether wch makes life a lil' more colourful (or spicy` lol). I think life in itself is best to live with slow improvement gradually, and not expecting too much. most is to appreciate oneself, no matter where you are.. what you do.. or to where you're pursuing.

I know the journey is long~ but I knw I will make it to the end. with patience and a self-stable approach.

- keith

home cook

literally spent 1.5 hrs preparing, dicing, chopping and frying home-cooked food just now~ one thing for sure, pumpkin is never an easy 'vegetable' to prepare. oh well~ but eating it reminds of being at home.. especially with garlic and a dip of soy sauce` =_='''

1st dish- stirfry mushroom, garlic, beef, potato with soy sauce
2nd dish- pumpkin steamed with soy sauce
:)

and top up with blueberry yoghurt with grapes~

Life is decent so far`` with the goods of life heading on towards my side, but only with time and its patience to see me till~~

Not to mention smeone's room is this messy.. but the bearer of her companionship in the future will be fortunate cos she can tidy clothes like this!


love~ ;)
her new blog template-
aprilariez.blogspot.com

- keith

boo

dear boo,


it's probably one of those moods where I feel to type u a msg.. but felt to try a variety, that's y I'm typing this here on my blog` :) I just returned frm the shopping mall, wer I had indulged upon my lasagna, salad.. bought 1% dermaveen for my neck and just had grocery shopping. all that was alone, but I felt the strength to live it here.. cos I knw earning outside is not an opportunity most ppl in this world have, particularly of our country Brunei. therefore, i'm obliged to enjoy up to the best I can.. as at the same time, ters smeone far in another island caring for me, supporting me..and giving me the light that I'm not alone, and I can still form myself to be a better person in time to come.

boo, guess wt.. it's a surprise for you~ I received ur chocolates and yellow notes` ;) it is just 2day when I checked.. finally a bigger parcel of some sort arrived. it had rained yesterday, and frm the outside it was all wet but luckily you had it wrapped in the plastic post-bag so your notes were salvaged~ :) the chocs as you insisted were a bit away, so I had to dispose of them. altgh the notes were sparse, they were kinda cute and there-in were strong reminders of your promises, and strong urge to keep this love going. thnks dear~ it's not easy being in the situation we're in, and not of course to mention ur fickle-heart.. but hey sincerity wise, you knw you can always make it up with ur everlasting pure personality~ =)

life for us, love for us.. felt like it's a loong time.. to wait and seek it's glory~ but with each & everyday.. it's an experience of a lifetime of how much we feel.. how much we inspire.. and how much we adore of one another~ haf you ever felt this feeling, where it was never given.. never expected~ to find smeone just right and just of pure comfort, seemingly as if known for years.. for decades.. with the vow to stand by each other regardless of challenges, regardless of hardships in the long years ahead. this is the feeling I'm feeling.. and this is the way that I'm seeking for myself.. n ever if things go astray, you knw you can always rely on me to make things work it's way back` ;)

I'm still a positive man.. and I knw deep in my heart, ters a reason for everyth. as the reason I'm abroad.. and as the reason I've met you.. n the reason for every challenges we face frm the start~ oh well.. dear~ time flies n as like you said.. it will not be long b4 we will have our time in Brunei wer we can enjoy Tutong beach and the away-city residents n market` :) (as you knw me, I always love tutong).

of all ppl, you knew what has been my main prority.. so thnks for willing to stand by me as I work to achieve my goal~ it's not too long till I get the chance to form a decent, new concrete block, just like what your dad is doing now.. improving ur home and making sure you've a nice and comfy place to stay` =) as for the moment, you knw I will just work, enjoy and love in every way I can~ please tk, and may God bless in everyth you do.. I will always want you to be a happy girl regardless.. <3 you boo.

- keith

time

having music played frm my iTunes on the cpu, it is typically one song that makes my mind calm and content, with the memories of my life coming back once again. I’ve put the song live on blog and it’s one of them wch reminds me of the days so vivid as a student.

I still remember this song occasionally coming by as one of the many songs that play as a random entity thru my iPod and headset~ I was either in my Indooroopilly home in the living room as a lone ranger, contemplating the long days ahead.. or laying down on the late-nite bus returning home frm a long day at the lib.. or taking a deep fresh air as I strolled alongside the ports of Southbank, either cherishing my personal self or dwelling into the acceptance of need to strive thru life's issues`


I still haven’t forgotten them.. the past. frm wer I was built up from. altgh I admit I’ve long gone far from them. its those occasional slip of time where you just feel like going back and admiring the times, and wonder how you’ve come to the present day` :)

hongkong.. u’ve been outstanding due to songs and voice you’ve contributed.. the touch, chemistry and smiles you’ve instilled upon when I just needed it` singapore.. thnks for the ever drastic times when things haven’t gone too smooth, and you just need to make every effort to make things smooth again.. tutong.. thnks for the dependence, the care.. and the willingness to show me around the most peaceful town on earth and lastly.. malaysia.. for the ever reliance of sincerity and genuine friendship distance can offer.

listening further.. I was in my A-levels, wondering how loyal I can get to when I’m still listening to the same tunes after 10 years. at that time, there weren’t much of a dream or a target where I was aiming to go.. except all I was, was focused on my books & my idol of dreams whose voice is just angelic and looks just vibrant. but now, ters this responsibility.. a goal and dream. amazingly, I’ve grown to think that way.. for there’s some thing I’m yet to achieve and it takes ‘time’ for me to do that. not just time, but patience` :)

okay~ now I guess I’m back to the present. for so~ just keep on working & doing the things that I'm ought to do.. and we’ll let time do its trick` ;) take care guys.. and enjoy the rest of the relaxing weekend~

- keith

Welcome Rocky~

finally.. it has come to this day when I stepped-foot onto the land that I once adore most~ after a couple of weeks in Nz, spending a gorgeous time over there.. I finally arrived to Australia. and b4 embarking onto a small plane to Rocky, I dropped by Brissie for a dip of refreshment down memory lane. I love Brisbane as I always have. Now, that I’m not too far from her being in Sister Rocky, it could only mean a new, wonderful experience for me in a unfamiliar world. so here I am waiting to see what Rocky can give to me` :)

As I was landing down the port of Rocky, all I could see was greens and browns.. translated to marshes and the river bank, with no sign of building nor men. excitingly, I was received by Kartini who took me for some grocery shopping and too, directing me to the office to collect keys for my staff accommodation.just for the aid of settling down, it just surprises me how well the hospital offers such a nice place of stay for a month, fully-equipped with a posh living room with flat-screen tv, kitchen with all wares, bed-room with air-conditioning and most-importantly, a queen-sized bed` ;)

truly engh my cozy home stay cud only lead me wondering if ter cud ever be any downturns. I noticed it straight-away~ the use of 3g. as I was anticipating the evening with a nice conversation thru the phone with my family and fren, it just strikes me that my credit was zero. apparently, with some experiment later on.. surfing, opening a fb news feed and looking at just a couple of photos cud take $6 off my prepaid load. so with some vibering.. $30 can just be a gone in a matter of mins -_-‘’’ that’s lesson no.1!


the next day came.. it was fully-bright and I had breakfast b4 embarking out to do some paperwork in the office. I did notice the soaring temperatures even at the early hours of this morning. aside from, it took me just 3 mins to get to the hospital main entrance and a couple more, being a friendly paediatric registrar opting to show me where I needed to go. as I was attended by the helpful staff, I swiftly completed my job and just in a matter of minutes, I was on my way to some exploring ard the city~ of course b4 that, my pure wisdom led me to the coffee house, to open the day with some hot latte~

not knowing my directions, I cud only walk. not to mention under the scorching sun~ I saw a bus-stop and a bus a few minutes later. Unlike buses in Brisbane that do have Go cards, this one sells tickets. I had a single for $3.60, but later to my knowledge that ‘my daily tickets still exist!’ for a cost of just $5! I cud only ask bus patrons for directions, wch then allowed me to stop at the city-centre. That’s when I came to realise that Rockhampton is not just the swampy land I once visualised!

I came along a strip of retails, as long as ever with 50s of shops running along.. with trees and small roads in between, reminding me of kuala belait. but to my amaze, this one varies from cafes to garments, ice-cream shops to big supermarkets like k-mart. I tght to myself.. this is seriously much better than Whangarei.

In my mind, I had a goal.. i.e. to go to a shopping mall where I could either get a better plan for internet mobile surfing or to top up my Vodafone prepaid. I asked around.. a senior man gave me directions to the big Target shop up front and.. a lady, guess what.. offered me the best help she cud ever give.. was to drive me to the biggest shopping mall in Rocky! coincidentally, she also works in health as a nurse where too, her husband is also named Keith. as I had the opportunity to view my directions frm her car, Stocklands (the biggest mall) was quite a fair way from the city.. having to cross the main bridge and turn a few rounds to arrive to this amazing place. She’s such a lovely lady~

I was just in awe.. this shopping mall… don think I cud ever get bored in Rocky~ this shopping mall is maybe around the size of 2 floors of the whole Indooroopilly shopping mall combined! ters literally everything here, except.. guess wt` ;) ters no Vodafone outlet! and guess wt again.. ters no Vodafone outlet anywhere in Rockhampton.

Lol!! but luckily, ters at least Optus. skipping plans, I bought a top up from the new agency~ and whilst taking my own sweet time, reminiscing the retails and surfing the net with my new-charged credit.. I suddenly realise I had a miss-out in one of my paperworks. anxious, I had to call another office.. and in doing that, I was put on a queue for 20-30 minutes with no one answering my calls and ending up spending the whole $30 credit I just paid for~ and guess wt, my non-acknowledgment of the surfing cost lead me to really zero credit.

following is the food court of Stocklands~ :)

The next thing in mind was to get back to the hospital. I asked for directions yet again, and was pointed out to. in this bus-stop luckily was a lad who was willing to lead me to the spot, and with his help, I was made known that this one bus-stop is the only one wch passes by the hospital from the mall, and that the buses wch do come by only every hour, every day! Lol.. I was made to laugh~ with his help, I got off to the office.. and with the certainty of staff’s hospitality, instead of having to fork out $50-100 for a call, I was offered to use the landline.. and I eventually received a voice after half-an-hour~ :) altgh.. my issue was not handled in a well-perfect manner, that is all I cud do to start off my internship preparation.

I’m pretty sure there are ever more true challenges awaiting me in the road ahead` but before tse, I just wanna say thnks to my family and much appreciation to the person, whom have allowed such an amazing yet memorable stay over in Nz. These memories are certainly non-buyable and irreplaceable for a yet unique and special experience, ever encountered in my life~ now.. it has come yet to another cycle of further waiting and patience, yet trust and belief that if indeed I cud meet the real light at the end of the tunnel.

But all in all, life at present always has to come to the fact that.. we ought to enjoy every moment of our present lives in appreciation and blessing, instead of worries and regret of the things that once were or even nw bothering us. cos.. we as human beings all deserve at least a breathe of things, we always wanted and love.

- keith